Love a stone. How big can love be?

The purpose of life and its deeper meaning call us to ask a simple question:

How much love is enough?

Can I love my mother and father, brothers and sisters, friends, children... enough?

Love is very tricky to deal with because more can always be given.

To illustrate this I would like to share about a friend of mine.

I always thought stones were stones until I met him.

We had knows each other for a while and I was well aware of his fascination with geology /stones/ and fossils.

One day he invited me to a big geological exhibition. I accepted the invitation and though we will pass through the halls, buy some "stones" and leave. I was mistaken. He stopped and looked at every exhibit with incredible curiosity and admiration studying it for a long, long, long time.

To me everything we saw looked the same. All I needed was a glance to decide I have seen enough but out of respect for my friend I stayed and looked on wondering what is it that he sees in them.

The more I looked the more I realized that not only are all rocks and crystals looked different but the materials out of which they were made were all different as well.

I kept on looking and wondering how much is there to life that I do not pay attention to.

If I observe and study one person the way a scientist would a stone how much is there to discover?

A person is a universe of thoughts, feelings, dreams and, in general, presence.

So my mind naturally moved to the ones I love starting with the presence of my wife.

Do I know her well enough?

Do I love her enough?

Do I now my children, family members and friends well enough?

Do I study them as my friend would a stone?

At first I catch myself thinking I do... but if they were the prime object of my research would I think the same.

The answer quickly moved to a NO!

If I would research them there would be always more to discover, more to be inspired about and more reasons to be fascinated, like and love them.

Seeing their weaknesses and mistakes I would be in pain hoping they can be stronger, wiser and happier.

Seeing their strengths I would be proud, comforted and aware I can ask for help if needed.

Thinking this way I came to a simple conclusion.

One love partner is more than enough to explore and research in depth throughout life.

Our love changes as we move through our lives therefore the research is very exciting.

Love is one when we are just married and have all the time in the world for each other.

It is different when the first child is born and we give it our time and attention almost in panic until utterly exhausted day and night.

Our confidence is different when the next children come but as they grow there is less time and energy to spend for our spouse. Here many people conclude that love has diminished.

Strangely though it does not mean our love has become weaker. Instead it seems to have grown wider and deeper capable to love more with one heart.

Our ego is polished and shaped to become a member of a larger system that is chaotic and needs input of energy to keep it together. That is why the input of love from every member of the family is essential. A delicate balance between individual gravitational forces need to be established where everyone can be free enough yet bound by the force of love.

Who is the center of this gravitational pull?

The love of the parents is at the core. The love the mother and father share pulls the family together. The love of the grandparents keep the clan together.

Therefor in terms of marriage one partner for life is more than enough if we are on the quest of discovering true love in its entirety of scope and depth.

Could there be a deeper meaning to the purpose of life than this?

Is there a higher goal than to love and be loved?

Money seem to be our goal that gives us comfort but they seem to never be enough no matter how much we have.

Contrary to money when love is present we seem to lack nothing, and paradoxically, always find what to give even if we have nothing.

Searching for a deeper meaning to life and sharing the findings.

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The simple dream behind human progress.

Why does a baby make the parents happy?

Growing up I always thought that life can not just be a set of fixed rules that can not be altered, rules that ultimately drive most people into misery.

Back then it seemed that the "limited reality" elder people used to paint life with was their own invention. I strongly disagreed that I will one day conform to a limiting system of thought and believed anything was and will be possible.

A middle aged person who has observed life much longer through the spectacles of family, society, nation, race and religion, and who has visited many corners of the world I confirm that our "reality" is a choice or result of choices. Even if a certain set of choices has led us to a particular situation we are free to make different choices, as of this moment, that will drive us to a new destination.  

If I was born to Aborigine family life will present me with particular set of choices. If I was born a son to a wealthy billionaire family my life will present to me a set of seemingly very different choices.

The idea of choice can easily be interpreted as having freedom but some people in this world have very little to choose from available to them while others seem to have almost unlimited spectrum of choices, or so it seems. 

Interestingly on both extremes of this scale we find people satisfied and happy with their "reality" or unhappy with it therefore:

material prosperity does not to guarantee happiness

as well as poverty does not guarantee suffering. 

When are the "wealthy" happy and what makes the "poor" enjoy life?

The answer in both cases seems to be: when love is present. 

It is as if love is a special dimension of live in which the experience of "reality" is supercharged with delicate sensitivity to things we never saw or felt before. There a human being raises to a different level of nobility and humanity. 

I find it fascinating to observe what some may call polarized political aspirations of the left, center and right because looking for a deeper meaning we find that they all share the same dream. 

If we call the ideal world our hearts long for Utopian society, Kingdom of God, Tantra or True Democracy we all actually have the same goal in mind - a place where we will be free, equal and share our talents thoughts and ultimately hearts without a need to shield ourselves.

It may come as a surprise to many but this ideal form of society already exists on a smaller scale in loving families. 

After being born a baby finds itself in a state of absolute dependency on the mercy, kindness and love of the parents. If parents are in a state of confusion or distress they man choose to terminate this child's life irregardless of its wish to live. As a child grows unless parents provide food and shelter it will quickly die. Due to this total dependency we can conclude that a child is in a position to be loved unconditionally without it being able to return anything for the love, time and money spent and the energy invested in it. 

Today many loving husbands, after witnessing the investment their wife makes in raising their children, conclude that the economic model we live in is unfair in excluding a mother's value creating input from the spectrum social-economic activities that add up to our Gross Domestic Product.  

In the latter stage of our growth as and individual but also a brother/sister/friend we develop social skills within the family and in the wider society that help us leans to share as we discover that not everyone is as unconditional in giving as our parents. 

As we mature further we find our loved one and the desire to care for and love the fruit of this love naturally develops in the hearts and minds of this new parents completing life's cycle. 

Child born in such a loving family experiences True Democracy, The Kingdom of God and the Utopian socialist dream feeling satisfied it is capable of giving love, time and energy in a similar unconditional manner as they were received by it.

This process of development into a fruitful human being mimics the soothing embrace of nature that it unconditionally giving, forgiving and being there for us humans generation after generation hoping that one day we will also find our inner peace. 

A child born and raised lacking the embracing love of parents and their nurturing example of giving everything unconditionally grows with a deep longing and hunger that nothing except true love can resolve. 

Going deeper and deeper into the secrets of life observed daily we find meaning that is simple, clear and truly liberating.

Searching for a deeper meaning to life and sharing the findings.

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